When is my curse going to be broken?

[Bungleistic]

I’m not trying to stir up controversy at all, I’m just simply asking a question. Do you think there are single people out there who have never been in a relationship at 24 years old, and are virgins at 24, and can never get the opposite sex to send them a message back, and sit back and watch literally everyone else get into relationships with ease, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to give them the time of day, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to hangout with them when anyone else can hangout with whoever they want when they want, and so on so forth? Because all of that is me. It would really make me feel a little bit of comfort to know that there’s someone out there that feels my struggle I bet there’s NO ONE on this planet that can say those things about themselves. It hurts never having had a girlfriend, but it hurts even more never having had sex. I really challenge anyone on here to tell me if there’s someone that knows what it’s like to struggle like this. When you look at the fact that I have tried so hard to get both for 24 years but have never been able to get it, but yet everyone else gets both on the daily? How can you not say there’s a curse? Just curious to find out what everyone thinks. There’s something out of my control that’s keeping me from having both. I just wonder when my curse is going to be broken.

 

[Lamb]

I know other millennials who are going through that same experience. It's not a curse.

If you're simply going about this to get sex then obviously that's the wrong plan. Women want a man who wants them for their personality, wit, intelligence, etc....

Where are you meeting women? Do you go to church? Do you attend Bible Studies to meet women?

 

[Lucian Hodoboc]

It would really make me feel a little bit of comfort to know that there’s someone out there that feels my struggle I bet there’s NO ONE on this planet that can say those things about themselves. It hurts never having had a girlfriend, but it hurts even more never having had sex. I really challenge anyone on here to tell me if there’s someone that knows what it’s like to struggle like this.

You're probably a troll, but in case you aren't, I'll have you know that there are many people your age and older who have never dated or had sex. There's even a tv show about it. It's called "The Undateables".

 

[Bungleistic]

I know other millennials who are going through that same experience. It's not a curse.

If you're simply going about this to get sex then obviously that's the wrong plan. Women want a man who wants them for their personality, wit, intelligence, etc....

Where are you meeting women? Do you go to church? Do you attend Bible Studies to meet women?

Did you comprehend what I posted? The question was, is there anyone 24 or older who is a virgin and has never had a relationship. Your post didn’t answer the question.


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[Lamb]

Did you comprehend what I posted? The question was, is there anyone 24 or older who is a virgin and has never had a relationship. Your post didn’t answer the question.


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I did answer it. I said that I know others going through the same thing.

 

[Bluezone777]

I'd think you would do yourself a favor and take the concept of being in a relationship off of the pedestal you put it on as your behavior in regards to it reeks of idolatry. There's more to life then being in a relationship and if you would put your energy and efforts into seeking out what you consider a worthwhile cause that's greater then yourself then you would possibly find what you are looking for but honestly I get the idea that you likely give off the vibe to women to stay away from you which might be why no woman is interested in you. It also seems you are rather envious of what others have and that's not something that's going to be found attractive to anyone.

I am curious as to what convinced you that nothing you are doing, saying, etc. has anything to do with your luck with women as you seem rather dead set on placing blame elsewhere which is par for the course for humanity as it's natural to place the blame somewhere else to duck out of the responsibility to fix what's wrong.

If you want an answer to your question, yes there are people who are 24+ who have not been in a relationship or engaged in sex. I haven't had any of that(I'm a 38 year old male by the way) and don't see myself as lacking in anything for it as having sex and being in a romantic relationship is not what life is about nor should it be the end goal of anyone's life. The life of a Christian should be focused on serving Christ and bringing glory to His name first no matter where you are and what your situation at the moment might be. I would also point out that God gives out different gifts to different people but the differences in the gifts He gives doesn't mean He favors one over the other for it as both marriage and singleness are both gifts in spite of what you might see it as.

I would say God is doing you a favor by keeping you single as I don't think you would do well with it as you in my view clearly couldn't handle the gift of marriage as you would make a mess of not only your life but whoever you got with which is why I think God has kept you from obtaining a relationship with a woman thus far. I can't be dogmatic about that statement but it's what I would see as a reasonable view based on what you shared with us so far.

 

[Bungleistic]

I'd think you would do yourself a favor and take the concept of being in a relationship off of the pedestal you put it on as your behavior in regards to it reeks of idolatry. There's more to life then being in a relationship and if you would put your energy and efforts into seeking out what you consider a worthwhile cause that's greater then yourself then you would possibly find what you are looking for but honestly I get the idea that you likely give off the vibe to women to stay away from you which might be why no woman is interested in you. It also seems you are rather envious of what others have and that's not something that's going to be found attractive to anyone.

I am curious as to what convinced you that nothing you are doing, saying, etc. has anything to do with your luck with women as you seem rather dead set on placing blame elsewhere which is par for the course for humanity as it's natural to place the blame somewhere else to duck out of the responsibility to fix what's wrong.

If you want an answer to your question, yes there are people who are 24+ who have not been in a relationship or engaged in sex. I haven't had any of that(I'm a 38 year old male by the way) and don't see myself as lacking in anything for it as having sex and being in a romantic relationship is not what life is about nor should it be the end goal of anyone's life. The life of a Christian should be focused on serving Christ and bringing glory to His name first no matter where you are and what your situation at the moment might be. I would also point out that God gives out different gifts to different people but the differences in the gifts He gives doesn't mean He favors one over the other for it as both marriage and singleness are both gifts in spite of what you might see it as.

I would say God is doing you a favor by keeping you single as I don't think you would do well with it as you in my view clearly couldn't handle the gift of marriage as you would make a mess of not only your life but whoever you got with which is why I think God has kept you from obtaining a relationship with a woman thus far. I can't be dogmatic about that statement but it's what I would see as a reasonable view based on what you shared with us so far.

But what if it is something I want? I have the right to want it, don’t I? It’s painful not having had either and I want those things. I want it to happen. Again, I want it to just happen already.


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[Albion]

I’m not trying to stir up controversy at all, I’m just simply asking a question. Do you think there are single people out there who have never been in a relationship at 24 years old, and are virgins at 24, and can never get the opposite sex to send them a message back, and sit back and watch literally everyone else get into relationships with ease, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to give them the time of day, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to hangout with them when anyone else can hangout with whoever they want when they want, and so on so forth? Because all of that is me.

Okay. It happens.

It would really make me feel a little bit of comfort to know that there’s someone out there that feels my struggle I bet there’s NO ONE on this planet that can say those things about themselves.

That's silly. There are many people in similar straits as you! Yes, there are. But remember that you are still young, so the notion that life is never going to change is unwarranted. But you've already been told this, haven't you? And you'd rather complain about your life.

I just wonder when my curse is going to be broken.

Hard to say. It's probably up to you. Either do something about it or go on preferring to make gloom and hopelessness your preoccupation.

 

[tango]

But what if it is something I want? I have the right to want it, don’t I? It’s painful not having had either and I want those things. I want it to happen. Again, I want it to just happen already.


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You can want absolutely anything. It doesn't mean you're entitled to have it. Honestly, in my experience the harder you chase women the harder it is to attract them. I always found that if my primary goal was "get a girlfriend" I got precisely nowhere but if I just got busy living I was more likely to meet people, and some of those people were women, and some of those women were attractive to me, and some of those women were attracted to me. I think I can safely say that every single one of my girlfriends, including the one I married, were people I met when I wasn't actively looking.

 

[SaRangSR]

I don’t know your culture..

But here in my city, in Asia.
Many people are still virgins at 24, including me. And also never have dated. It’s super normal here. People tend to get married at ages 27/28.

It depends on the culture..

But I understand your feelings. I see people around my age getting a gf/bf, it feels like I’m left out..
It can be frustrating sometimes.

 

[tango]

One other thought, be aware that different people use different standards to count as "in a relationship"

In my university days I was frequently surrounded by girls but wasn't "in a relationship" with any of them. They were friends - platonic friends - but people who casually observed could have been forgiven for thinking I was the guy who always had a girlfriend. Most of the time I didn't because I didn't particularly want the commitment. My friend's son frequently talks about his girlfriend but he's 12 so just what he means by "girlfriend" is anybody's guess.

 

[Forgiven1]

Yes there are still people at that age whoso through those same things.

 

[Angelina1239]

I’m not trying to stir up controversy at all, I’m just simply asking a question. Do you think there are single people out there who have never been in a relationship at 24 years old, and are virgins at 24, and can never get the opposite sex to send them a message back, and sit back and watch literally everyone else get into relationships with ease, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to give them the time of day, and can never get someone of the opposite sex to hangout with them when anyone else can hangout with whoever they want when they want, and so on so forth? Because all of that is me. It would really make me feel a little bit of comfort to know that there’s someone out there that feels my struggle I bet there’s NO ONE on this planet that can say those things about themselves. It hurts never having had a girlfriend, but it hurts even more never having had sex. I really challenge anyone on here to tell me if there’s someone that knows what it’s like to struggle like this. When you look at the fact that I have tried so hard to get both for 24 years but have never been able to get it, but yet everyone else gets both on the daily? How can you not say there’s a curse? Just curious to find out what everyone thinks. There’s something out of my control that’s keeping me from having both. I just wonder when my curse is going to be broken.

Saving yourself for the right person is the very best thing. Many people never do or only late in life.
I have a friend who found the man she is now very happy with at age 50! I fell in love with my husband at age 25 and yes, he is my one and only. I am proud of that.

Forget what you see on TV and movies. The best way is be yourself, look for a truly good soul that you connect with. Keep your standards high and be guided by God in prayer.

 

[ValleyGal]

But what if it is something I want? I have the right to want it, don’t I? It’s painful not having had either and I want those things. I want it to happen. Again, I want it to just happen already.


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Anyone can want anything. I want a piece of land where I can build my dream house and have a different car to drive for each day of the week. I want a body that works better than the one I have right now. I want a dog that doesn't bark incessantly at every neighbour dog that walks on by. Does it mean I'm going to get any of those? Not likely. Am I entitled to any of those? No one owes me anything, especially not God.

My sister is 59 years old, never dated, and is still a virgin. She desperately wanted a husband all our lives and often wondered why she never got one. After all, she was pretty, accomplished, quirky (some read that as "fun"). She also believed God spoke to her about one man who was to become her husband, except he was never interested in her and met a sweet lady at Bible College that he married.

Others here have said it: go out and live your life. Don't pine your life away while waiting for a girlfriend before you start living. Time is short! Enjoy it! Make every moment count, develop your character, serve the Lord, be optimistic, content and positive, helpful, and most of all, grateful. Go out and make friends, invest in a community, and eventually word will get around what a friendly, fun guy you are. It will happen before you know it, but don't let desperation embitter you. Seek God's Kingdom first. Everything else will fall into place.

 

[Lucian Hodoboc]

Am I entitled to any of those? No one owes me anything, especially not God.

How did you come to that conclusion?

 

[ValleyGal]

How did you come to that conclusion?

Introspection, maturity, life experience. And the notion that when I give, I give out of the goodness of my heart, not because anyone is entitled to what I give. God sent his Son out of the goodness of his heart, not because we are entitled to salvation, but because HE wanted us to come to know him through Jesus. And I am not so special that I should be entitled to anything in this world without working for it.

 

[tango]

My sister is 59 years old, never dated, and is still a virgin. She desperately wanted a husband all our lives and often wondered why she never got one.

Just to pick up on this, I loosely know a guy who was in his 70s and never married. Given his age and faith I would assume he remained a virgin but it's none of my business so I can't say with 100% certainty.

During his 70s he moved into assisted living and met a widowed lady who he ended up marrying. I don't see them all that often but the joy they obviously bring each other really is heart warming.

You never know when life will send something good your way.