How to teach kids manners

[Jesus Saves]

These days manners seem to go by the waste side. Thank you notes seem to be a lost art. Kids even very young kids can learn the concept of thank you notes. A child who likes to scribble or draw, can scribble a picture to add with your thank you notes. This can apply to little ones ages 18- 24 months old. You can tell them that they're sending a thank you note to their aunt, grandparent for the toy or clothing item they received for their birthday. Kids who are learning to write their ABCs can practice doing so by writing thank you
While my best friend Kari, her son Christopher & I were eating lunch back in 1989 he said chip. I looked at her and say Christopher can say chip, he can say lease and thank you. I held some chips up to Christopher and asked him what do you say? we taught Christopher to say please and thank you.

 

[Lamb]

Do you think that so many parents have lost the art of manners that they don't know to teach them to their kids?

 

[Hammster]

My two year old says thank you without prompting (still working on Please). So if kids aren't being polite, it's because the parents aren't teaching them.

 

[Jesus Saves]

Do you think that so many parents have lost the art of manners that they don't know to teach them to their kids?

Yes, I know parents don't teach their kids manners. I have seen and heard this in the way kids act and speak. This has to make Jesus sad, hearing and lack of manners.

 

[Jesus Saves]

My two year old says thank you without prompting (still working on Please). So if kids aren't being polite, it's because the parents aren't teaching them.

Hammester, I'm impressed that your two year old says thank you without being prompted. That speaks well of how you and the love of your life are raising him or her.

 

[Inkachu]

We don't live in a world that communicates primarily by "notes" or letters anymore. Technology has allowed us to communicate with phone calls, emails, video messages, and more. If a kid doesn't want to sit down and pencil out a note, but is willing to make a phone call or send a video saying "thank you", I'd be fine with that. What matters is that they're being thankful, not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents. Of course, if you have a child who enjoys writing notes or letters, more power to them. As for basic manners, that's on the shoulders of the parents, you don't blame a child for the failures of their parents. I taught my son early on not only to say "please" and "thank you", but to be helpful to anyone he sees in need (holding doors for people, etc). He's grown into a young man with a heart of gold who has great compassion and sympathy for others, which makes me so proud.

 

[tango]

We don't live in a world that communicates primarily by "notes" or letters anymore. Technology has allowed us to communicate with phone calls, emails, video messages, and more. If a kid doesn't want to sit down and pencil out a note, but is willing to make a phone call or send a video saying "thank you", I'd be fine with that. What matters is that they're being thankful, not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents. Of course, if you have a child who enjoys writing notes or letters, more power to them. As for basic manners, that's on the shoulders of the parents, you don't blame a child for the failures of their parents. I taught my son early on not only to say "please" and "thank you", but to be helpful to anyone he sees in need (holding doors for people, etc). He's grown into a young man with a heart of gold who has great compassion and sympathy for others, which makes me so proud.

That's a really good point, but to be honest a text message that says "tkx" or some such shouldn't really be allowed to count.

I agree entirely that being thankful is the crucial aspect rather than sticking to a tradition that isn't necessarily relevant, but expressing thankfulness should really be more than just a couple of seconds worth of throwaway gesture. I remember during my childhood years when getting money for Christmas meant a lot to me, I'd be really grateful towards the person who gave me the equivalent of six months worth of my pocket money. The flip side is that I remember a family friend who always gave me exactly two pounds (about $3 at current exchange rates) for birthdays and Christmas when I was a child. When I was 8 it represented a fair amount of money (especially since it was *COUGH* years ago and money bought more than it does now). But the amount never increased over the years, so when I got my two pounds for my 18th birthday (which by then didn't even buy a single beer) I must admit I struggled to feel much gratitude, nor did I feel inclined to spend 15% of it on a stamp to send a thankyou note. And because it was *COUGH* years ago there was no email so I couldn't even do that.

 

[Rens]

That's a really good point, but to be honest a text message that says "tkx" or some such shouldn't really be allowed to count.

I agree entirely that being thankful is the crucial aspect rather than sticking to a tradition that isn't necessarily relevant, but expressing thankfulness should really be more than just a couple of seconds worth of throwaway gesture. I remember during my childhood years when getting money for Christmas meant a lot to me, I'd be really grateful towards the person who gave me the equivalent of six months worth of my pocket money. The flip side is that I remember a family friend who always gave me exactly two pounds (about $3 at current exchange rates) for birthdays and Christmas when I was a child. When I was 8 it represented a fair amount of money (especially since it was *COUGH* years ago and money bought more than it does now). But the amount never increased over the years, so when I got my two pounds for my 18th birthday (which by then didn't even buy a single beer) I must admit I struggled to feel much gratitude, nor did I feel inclined to spend 15% of it on a stamp to send a thankyou note. And because it was *COUGH* years ago there was no email so I couldn't even do that.

How terribly ungrateful of you. You should have sent flowers and a letter with oooooh thank you soooooo much!
Maybe you would have gotten more then the next year lol.

 

[Lamb]

We don't live in a world that communicates primarily by "notes" or letters anymore. Technology has allowed us to communicate with phone calls, emails, video messages, and more. If a kid doesn't want to sit down and pencil out a note, but is willing to make a phone call or send a video saying "thank you", I'd be fine with that. What matters is that they're being thankful, not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents. Of course, if you have a child who enjoys writing notes or letters, more power to them. As for basic manners, that's on the shoulders of the parents, you don't blame a child for the failures of their parents. I taught my son early on not only to say "please" and "thank you", but to be helpful to anyone he sees in need (holding doors for people, etc). He's grown into a young man with a heart of gold who has great compassion and sympathy for others, which makes me so proud.

I love this part: not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents.

That is what bothers me sometimes is that we're trying to enforce something from the past that might not be relevant in practice. Using today's technology isn't an awful thing so maybe parents and grandparents should learn to embrace it?

 

[psalms 91]

I love this part: not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents.

That is what bothers me sometimes is that we're trying to enforce something from the past that might not be relevant in practice. Using today's technology isn't an awful thing so maybe parents and grandparents should learn to embrace it?

I think the idea of something personal and heartfelt is what most want and a text seems so impersonal maybe

 

[tango]

I love this part: not that they're adhering to practices of their parents or grandparents.

That is what bothers me sometimes is that we're trying to enforce something from the past that might not be relevant in practice. Using today's technology isn't an awful thing so maybe parents and grandparents should learn to embrace it?

Up to a point. A large part of maturing is understanding what the other person would appreciate rather than necessarily what you might like to give. So while a teenager thanking a peer might get away with "tkx dude" as a text message, Great Aunt Maude is far more likely to appreciate a hand written note even if it is short. If it's all about how I want to express myself regardless of whether the other person will appreciate (or even understand, where text speak is concerned) then it's right back to everything revolving around me rather than interacting with others in a manner that works for everybody.