God gives graces that lead to repentance. Ultimately every good thing that one has is a grace from God. But I agree that some folk like to pretend that they are passive in the matter of repentance and passive in the matter of saving faith. Some like to quote the verse fragment that says "dead in trespasses and sins" as a proof that they (and you) can contribute nothing whatever to your own salvation from sins. The context helps settle the meaning of the phrase.
And you were once dead in your sins and offences, in which you walked in times past, according to the age of this world, according to the prince of the power of this sky, the spirit who now works in the sons of distrust. And we too were all conversant in these things, in times past, by the desires of our flesh, acting according to the will of the flesh and according to our own thoughts. And so we were, by nature, sons of wrath, even like the others. Yet still, God, who is rich in mercy, for the sake of his exceedingly great charity with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our sins, has enlivened us together in Christ, by whose grace you have been saved. And he has raised us up together, and he has caused us to sit down together in the heavens, in Christ Jesus, so that he may display, in the ages soon to arrive, the abundant wealth of his grace, by his goodness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace, you have been saved through faith. And this is not of yourselves, for it is a gift of God. And this is not of works, so that no one may glory. For we are his handiwork, created in Christ Jesus for the good works which God has prepared and in which we should walk. [SUP]Ephesians 2:1-10[/SUP]
The passage points to one walking when "dead" and being conversant too thus making a nonsense of the idea that the phrase teaches passivity in matters appertaining to salvation (and by implication damnation). The passage teaches spiritual death but not inactivity with regard to matters appertaining to sin. And since repentance as well as faith mark a reversal of activity as well as a reversal of mental alignment it follows that the death in sins and trespasses is a quite active death and is dead only with respect to the absence of eternal life. One is dead in sins and trespasses because sins and trespasses cause one to be dead towards God. Repentance is turning away from sins and trespasses as well as being sorrowful about having done them. The sorrow that marks repentance is called godly sorrow by Paul and he remarks that godly sorrow produces enduring repentance. Thus those who are "dead in sins and trespasses" are worldly people who go about their worldly business while having no vital relationship with God and thus no eternal life.
Ephesians 2:1
Chapter Eph 2:1-10. Regeneration of the Ephesians, an Instance of Gratuitous Salvation
1. And you hath he quickened] The construction is broken, and the gap is filled by the inserted verb, inferred from Eph 2:5 below, where however “we” has taken the place of “you.” Better, perhaps, did He quicken (as R. V.); the Gr. verb in Eph 2:5 being the aorist. Ideally, in their slain and risen Lord’s triumph, actually, in their spiritual regeneration, “believing on His name,” they had definitely received “eternal life.”—The English reader will remember that in the A. V. “to quicken” means seldom if ever to excite what already lives, but to bring from death to life.
Observe here the great theme of the Church and its Head treated in the special aspect of entrance into the Body by Divine regeneration of persons. For close parallels, though they treat the matter more from the side of Christ’s atoning work, cp. Col 1:21; Col 2:13; passages which, if written shortly before this, may have suggested the form of the opening phrase of this.
who were dead] Lit. being dead, “when you were dead;” devoid of spiritual and eternal life; see the next words. Obviously this weighty phrase needs to be read in the light of other truths; such as the existence of spirit, and the full presence of conscience, and of accountability, in the unregenerate. But those truths must not be allowed unduly to tone down this statement, which distinctly teaches that the state of the unregenerate has a true analogy to physical death; and that that analogy on the whole consists in this, that (1) it is a state in which a living principle, necessary for organization, growth and energy, in reference to God and holiness, is entirely lacking; (2) it is a state which has no innate tendency to develope such a principle of life. The principle must come to it altogether ab extra.—The latest researches into nature confirm the conviction that dead matter has absolutely no inner tendency to generate life, which must come into it ab extra if it is to live; a suggestive analogy.
On the doctrine of spiritual death as the state of unregenerate man, cp. ch. Eph 5:14; Joh 5:24; 1Jn 3:14; 1Jn 5:12; and see Joh 3:3; Joh 6:53. There are passages where “death” is used as a strong term to denote a comparatively lifeless state of the regenerate soul, needing (if it is to be escaped) not new birth, which is a thing once accomplished, but revival. But this modified sense of “death” must not be allowed to lower the absolute sense in a passage like this, with its peculiar doctrinal emphasis on the contrast of death and life. The state here described is not one of suppressed life, but of absence of life. Cp. 1Ti 5:6; Rev 3:1.
2Co 5:14, sometimes quoted of spiritual death, is not in point: translate, “then did all die,” and interpret of the death, representatively in Christ, of “all” at Calvary.
in trespasses and sins] Better, in respect of your trespasses, &c.—The Gr. construction is the dative without the preposition “in,” (so Col 2:13); and indicates conditioning circumstances.—What is the distinction between “trespass” and “sin”? It has been held that “trespass” is more of the conception, and “sin” of the act; or again that “trespass” is more of omission, “sin” of commission. But usage forbids any certainty in such inferences. In Eze 18:26 the LXX. use the word paraptôma (trespass) of the sin which the “righteous” commits and in which he dies. Etymologically, it is a fall over; and this may be either over a pebble or over a precipice. In actual usage, however, there is a slight occasional tendency in “trespass” towards a mitigated idea of sin, a “fault,” as in Gal 6:1; and it is possible that we have this here; as if to say, “in every form of evil-doing, whether lighter (trespasses) or heavier (sins).” But it is more probable still that the phrase is used designedly for accumulation’s sake alone, without precise distinction; as if to say, “evil-doing, however described.”
See Abp. Trench, N. T. Synonyms, under the word ἁμαρτία, &c. And above, note on Eph 1:7.