people with overly agressive nature

MS140ukn

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 6, 2015
Messages
1,335
Location
Northern california
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Non-Denominational
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
how do you deal with people who seem to have no control over their behavior? i pmed someone on another forum talking about a forum..and the person thought i was solicitating. he then sent me a nasty negative reply. i told him, "you could of replied back with less agressive reply" but he didnt reply back to me.
 

MarkFL

La Villa Strangiato
Valued Contributor
Joined
May 20, 2015
Messages
3,221
Age
61
Location
St. Augustine, FL.
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Atheist
Political Affiliation
Moderate
Marital Status
In Relationship
I ban them.
Ban.gif


Seriously though...I just distance myself from those who cannot be civil or reasonable. I will just stop responding to or acknowledging them in any way.
 

MS140ukn

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 6, 2015
Messages
1,335
Location
Northern california
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Non-Denominational
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
actually the problem has since been resolved. the person in question is no longer on my ignore list. thx for reply.
 

MarkFL

La Villa Strangiato
Valued Contributor
Joined
May 20, 2015
Messages
3,221
Age
61
Location
St. Augustine, FL.
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Atheist
Political Affiliation
Moderate
Marital Status
In Relationship
Do you mean you put the person on your ignore list? I have done that a few times over the years, but I always take them right back off the list because I want to see what kind of holes they will dig for themselves. LOL!

idiot.jpg
 

MS140ukn

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 6, 2015
Messages
1,335
Location
Northern california
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Non-Denominational
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
Do you mean you put the person on your ignore list? I have done that a few times over the years, but I always take them right back off the list because I want to see what kind of holes they will dig for themselves. LOL!

idiot.jpg

i have done that as well. i ignore, only to un ignore.
 

80sChild

Active member
Joined
Aug 18, 2015
Messages
29
Age
44
Location
Sonora, Mexico
Gender
Female
Religious Affiliation
Other Church
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
But sometimes it's just how that person is but doesn't like to be, sometimes people act before they think , they are impulsive and will regret the post 2min later, these kinds people suffer from ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and, or BPD (borderline personality disorder) like me. I find myself sometimes asking for forgiveness when theses out burst happen. Sometimes we should wait and see if we get an explanation from that person, we might find out a whole lot more than we thought, that person may be on the edge ready to jump and we were all that kept them from jumping just by being concerned. So don't be so quick to ignore or block someone, they may be reaching out and you just couldn't see it....


80'sChild
 

Lamb

God's Lil Lamb
Community Team
Administrator
Supporting Member
Joined
Jun 10, 2015
Messages
33,199
Age
58
Gender
Female
Religious Affiliation
Lutheran
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
Acceptance of the Trinity & Nicene Creed
Yes
But sometimes it's just how that person is but doesn't like to be, sometimes people act before they think , they are impulsive and will regret the post 2min later, these kinds people suffer from ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and, or BPD (borderline personality disorder) like me. I find myself sometimes asking for forgiveness when theses out burst happen. Sometimes we should wait and see if we get an explanation from that person, we might find out a whole lot more than we thought, that person may be on the edge ready to jump and we were all that kept them from jumping just by being concerned. So don't be so quick to ignore or block someone, they may be reaching out and you just couldn't see it....

80'sChild

A lot of this is so true! Also, there are people who aren't feeling well and so it's easy for them to lash out at others because of illness or pain that is aggravating them. Then there are the people who get drunk and post online. Ah, yes, so many reasons so we can't let it affect us personally.
 

psalms 91

Well-known member
Moderator
Valued Contributor
Supporting Member
Joined
Jun 22, 2015
Messages
15,348
Age
76
Location
Pa
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Charismatic
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
I agree completely, we need to have understanding and that is hard sometimes because we react before we think
 

MoreCoffee

Well-known member
Valued Contributor
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
19,263
Location
Western Australia
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Catholic
Political Affiliation
Moderate
Marital Status
Single
Acceptance of the Trinity & Nicene Creed
Yes
I ignore certain topics more often than ignoring people. But some people are very difficult to be around so .... well I try to be helpful when I can but avoid contact when it is not necessary or helpful.
 

MS140ukn

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 6, 2015
Messages
1,335
Location
Northern california
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Non-Denominational
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
ive met some really difficult people online. there are times when i try to console them in realizing that the stuff they are saying to me is hurtful. people online tend to say hurtful things because they are hidden behind screen..the tables would be turned if they faced me eye to eye. also, many a times i sometimes say things before i think about what i want to say..and that would offend the person...and sometimes, that person would "twist" his or her words making an awkward situation more confusing
 

80sChild

Active member
Joined
Aug 18, 2015
Messages
29
Age
44
Location
Sonora, Mexico
Gender
Female
Religious Affiliation
Other Church
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
A lot of this is so true! Also, there are people who aren't feeling well and so it's easy for them to lash out at others because of illness or pain that is aggravating them. Then there are the people who get drunk and post online. Ah, yes, so many reasons so we can't let it affect us personally.

Right! Let it slid off like water on a ducks back!


80'sChild
 

Tigger

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,555
Age
64
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Lutheran
Marital Status
Married
Acceptance of the Trinity & Nicene Creed
Yes
Sometimes I look myself straight in the mirror, sternly pointing my finger saying "Knock It OFF!"

Sometimes it works, sometimes it causes an argument, and trust me that ain't pretty :argue:
 

psalms 91

Well-known member
Moderator
Valued Contributor
Supporting Member
Joined
Jun 22, 2015
Messages
15,348
Age
76
Location
Pa
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Charismatic
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
lol I would like to see that
 

seekingsolace

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 14, 2015
Messages
130
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Christian
Marital Status
Single
I'm not overly aggressive, you're overly aggressive.

Last time I'll attempt to joke... I'll see myself out.
 
Last edited:

popsthebuilder

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 17, 2015
Messages
1,850
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Sometimes I look myself straight in the mirror, sternly pointing my finger saying "Knock It OFF!"

Sometimes it works, sometimes it causes an argument, and trust me that ain't pretty :argue:
Could be needed. Sometimes part of being truthful with yourself and God.

Faith in selfless Unity through Good
 

tango

... and you shall live ...
Valued Contributor
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
14,954
Location
Somewhere Nice Not Nice
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Acceptance of the Trinity & Nicene Creed
Yes
I agree completely, we need to have understanding and that is hard sometimes because we react before we think

This is one advantage of message boards, we get a bit of time to think about what we want to say and can go back and edit it before we hit the magic Post button.
 

tango

... and you shall live ...
Valued Contributor
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
14,954
Location
Somewhere Nice Not Nice
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Acceptance of the Trinity & Nicene Creed
Yes
ive met some really difficult people online. there are times when i try to console them in realizing that the stuff they are saying to me is hurtful. people online tend to say hurtful things because they are hidden behind screen..the tables would be turned if they faced me eye to eye. also, many a times i sometimes say things before i think about what i want to say..and that would offend the person...and sometimes, that person would "twist" his or her words making an awkward situation more confusing

It's quite common for people to be very brave from behind a keyboard, knowing they will almost never meet the people they are abusing face to face. One forum I used some time ago was mostly free of that kind of thing - it was a cycling-related forum and it was far from rare to meet other forum members on organised rides. So if you'd been needlessly nasty to someone there was a pretty good chance you'd meet them face-to-face sooner or later.

Another factor is that in verbal communication the actual words used are less than 10% of the overall message. I forget the exact figures, it's something like 48% body language, 44% tonal inflections and only 8% of the message is the actual words. It's easy to see how that would be the case with a simple example:

You go to the customer services desk with a complaint about a product. The assistant flashes you a look of burning anger, spins in their chair and screams "WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM???" at you from across the room. Or the assistant turns their chair, smiles as they come across to greet you and asks you what the problem is. The words might be the same but you'd get a very different message from the first situation.
 

MS140ukn

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 6, 2015
Messages
1,335
Location
Northern california
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Non-Denominational
Political Affiliation
Conservative
Marital Status
Married
It's quite common for people to be very brave from behind a keyboard, knowing they will almost never meet the people they are abusing face to face. One forum I used some time ago was mostly free of that kind of thing - it was a cycling-related forum and it was far from rare to meet other forum members on organised rides. So if you'd been needlessly nasty to someone there was a pretty good chance you'd meet them face-to-face sooner or later.

Another factor is that in verbal communication the actual words used are less than 10% of the overall message. I forget the exact figures, it's something like 48% body language, 44% tonal inflections and only 8% of the message is the actual words. It's easy to see how that would be the case with a simple example:

You go to the customer services desk with a complaint about a product. The assistant flashes you a look of burning anger, spins in their chair and screams "WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM???" at you from across the room. Or the assistant turns their chair, smiles as they come across to greet you and asks you what the problem is. The words might be the same but you'd get a very different message from the first situation.

you know based off my experience with support, people tend to be more nicer online than face to face..up to 65% of the time. and most cases, those wanting support never get it. notorious is standing in line at the dmv lolz
 

Alithis

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
2,680
Location
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Pentecostal
Marital Status
Married
i have done that as well. i ignore, only to un ignore.

haha
the ignore feature is as funny as human nature is predictable ..

i ignore the person, then un-ignore to see if my ignoring them bothered them, then ignore then again and wonder if they are ignoring my ignoring... hahah makes me laugh at my silly self .
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i was looking back to see if she was looking back to see if i was looking back to see if she was looking back at me
 

Alithis

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
2,680
Location
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Religious Affiliation
Pentecostal
Marital Status
Married
you know based off my experience with support, people tend to be more nicer online than face to face..up to 65% of the time. and most cases, those wanting support never get it. notorious is standing in line at the dmv lolz

its a soft answer turns away wrath scenario with things online .
 
Top Bottom