How people change

[NewCreation435]

This is a talk that I sometimes mention to my client and encourage them to watch about how people change and how to provoke change in their lives.
three take away for me has been:
1. make small changes
2. reward yourself after you do the new habit or changed behavior
3. pair an old habit with a new one. The old habit becomes a reminder to do the new one.

https://youtu.be/AdKUJxjn-R8

 

[tango]

Good points there.... it's so easy to start with grand intentions and try to change everything at once, only to find it doesn't stick. I like the idea of pairing habits, going to give that one a try

 

[NewCreation435]

i've found that most people try to do too much and end up not following through with it. Smaller changes, like exercising for 5 or 10 minutes or doing 5 push ups or something like that is easier to commit to. It helps build momentum

 

[tango]

i've found that most people try to do too much and end up not following through with it. Smaller changes, like exercising for 5 or 10 minutes or doing 5 push ups or something like that is easier to commit to. It helps build momentum

I was thinking about the people who decide to lose weight by cutting out candy, chocolate, cake and just about everything else they enjoy eating, all at once. It's depressingly predictable that within a couple of weeks they've "failed" because - gasp - they couldn't resist a candy bar and because they "failed" so fast they decide they can't continue with it.

 

[Ruth]

I was thinking about the people who decide to lose weight by cutting out candy, chocolate, cake and just about everything else they enjoy eating, all at once. It's depressingly predictable that within a couple of weeks they've "failed" because - gasp - they couldn't resist a candy bar and because they "failed" so fast they decide they can't continue with it.

I can relate to that. That's when I try to reduce I include a bit of sweets at times and have it as an acceptable food. I do tend to think I've failed, though, if I constantly go off of it.

 

[psalms 91]

I can relate to that. That's when I try to reduce I include a bit of sweets at times and have it as an acceptable food. I do tend to think I've failed, though, if I constantly go off of it.

Yes, I am addicted to sweets

 

[Lamb]

I was told that it takes 21 days to create a new habit and some people don't want to give it that long so they resort to the old habit. It takes determination to stick with it. It helps to have people supporting you for encouragement.

 

[NewCreation435]

I was told that it takes 21 days to create a new habit and some people don't want to give it that long so they resort to the old habit. It takes determination to stick with it. It helps to have people supporting you for encouragement.

it's actually closer to 90 days

 

[Lamb]

it's actually closer to 90 days

Has it ever taken you that long though? I'm closer to the 21 days.

 

[NewCreation435]

Has it ever taken you that long though? I'm closer to the 21 days.

It depends on what your trying to change. If your counseling someone who is engaging in cutting behavior or negative thinking then 90 days is not that long. Or if someone is trying to stop smoking for example.
What we have found is that simply by using change talk it helps promote change. It provokes them to think about what they want to change

 

[Lamb]

It depends on what your trying to change. If your counseling someone who is engaging in cutting behavior or negative thinking then 90 days is not that long. Or if someone is trying to stop smoking for example.
What we have found is that simply by using change talk it helps promote change. It provokes them to think about what they want to change

I was thinking more of habits than addictions or mental illness issues.