As you guys know. My husband has lost his job. This has struck both of us very hard, although my husband handles things better than I do. I keep wondering what is wrong with me as compared to other Christians. I struggle so much with depression and anxiety. Sometimes I feel like I can't bear one more minute of this. My heart tells me that God has a plan, but then I get scared feel so alone and like things will never be ok again.
Can others here please tell me your best Bible verses, and what helps you get through trials? I seem to be living in constant fear.
First, I am sorry for your struggles.
Second, you haven't done anything wrong. God ordains trials and tribulation for blessing, not for evil. (Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.)
I hope my story encourages you. Here it is:
10 years ago life was going great. Then my sister-in-law was diagnosed with a brain tumor and my younger brothers newborn was diagnosed with an incurable disease. My sister-in-law went through treatment, but on Labor Day weekend her husband, my older brother, had a fatal heart attack and died in her arms. My younger brothers son died in December of 09 at 10 months. In 2011 my younger brother had a girl. She had the same disease. Incurable. In 2011 I was laid off from a job that I loved. I was unemployed until 2015. In 2013 my brother had a third child. Same disease. Incurable. In June of 2013 my dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He died on August 2, less than 2 months from knowing. In October my mother-in-law died from heart disease. In December my brothers son died. In November of 2014 my sister-in-law died from brain cancer. In March of 2016 my brother's daughter died from her disease.
We as a family were Christians. What had we done that God would bring this upon us? The answer...nothing. But, God gave the right for us to suffer anyway.
I read the book of Job...a lot. I saw where two grieving parents tried to resolve what was happening. In chapter 2, Jobs wife said, "Curse God and die." Job responded by saying, "Shall we praise God only for the good and not when the bad comes our way?" I saw how Job and his friends struggled with their theology. How could bad happen except that Job deserved it? But Job said he was innocent (and he was). God okayed the sorrow that Satan brought on Job because God would sustain Job's faith through it all. Job was to be blessed by the trial, not cursed.
I read the book of Habakkuk and saw his response to the horrors that were coming his way. ( Habakkuk 3:17-19 Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. God, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer’s; he makes me tread on my high places.) Could I, indeed would I, rejoice in the Lord, even if all was lost?
I read Corrie Ten Boom's book, "The Hiding Place," and she wrote, "I have learned to hold things lightly." I read CH Spurgeon and he said, "I have learned to kiss the wave that tosses me onto the Rock of Ages." I learned "In all things give thanks for this is the will of God." By God's grace I held on to faith.
God has brought me and my family through the valley of humiliation and through the valley of the shadow of death. We have wept grievous tears. We have kissed the wave.
God has placed us next to still waters for a moment. I am grateful. At the same time, I testify to you that God never leaves us and never forsakes us. I realize that if all hell fell upon me, I would still be eternally blessed because God has chosen to save me from my sins. He redeemed me. He reconciled me to Him. I am eternally blessed. If I were to lose every earthly possession and all whom I love, I would still be greatly blessed because Jesus has reached down and died so that I might live. What more can we wish for. We are children of THE KING!!! How awesome is that!!! What can man do to us? What fear can ever remove the glory of being a child of the King? Nothing can separate us from our God!!!
God promises that He will give you what you need. The budget may get tight. You may have to "hold your things lightly" and let them go. But God will never let go of YOU. He will bless you in your trials. I encourage you. Keep the Faith! God WILL keep you.
Also, surround yourself with a community of believers who will pray for you and lift you up. We are family. We walk the path together, not as lone rangers.
Peace
