Respect has to be earned?

[Lamb]

I keep hearing from people that respect has to be earned. But I read in Mark that Jesus said "Love your neighbor as yourself."

Do you think that respect has to be earned, or do you love your neighbor as yourself? Do you think the two statements are in conflict?

 

[tango]

We can love someone without necessarily respecting them.

 

[Messy]

I keep hearing from people that respect has to be earned. But I read in Mark that Jesus said "Love your neighbor as yourself."

Do you think that respect has to be earned, or do you love your neighbor as yourself? Do you think the two statements are in conflict?

David respected Saul because of his position. Paul said sorry when he called the high priest a white washed wall. Had it not been a high priest, it would have been no problem. He didn't earn his respect.

 

[Ammi]

Perhaps, for me, respect is something that can be lost. Though not by God. I respect God. He is my Father. As I am in Christ, His acceptance of me is unconditional. Though a loving father will, when necessary, discipline his child. When I think that I have this position because He gained it for me by sending Jesus to the cross, my heart is again softened. What an amazing God we have!
Respect, reverential awe, and gratitude knowing that when I stumble, He is always there when I need Him most.
"Faithful One, so unchanging
Ageless One, You're my rock of peace
Lord of all, I depend on You
I call out to You, again and again
I call out to You, again and again
You are my rock in times of trouble
You lift me up when I fall down
All through the storm
Your love is, the anchor
My hope is in You alone" - Brian Doerksen

 

[prism]

We can love someone without necessarily respecting them.

Can you disrespect a person and still love them?

Keeping in mind...

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, [5] does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,...

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

 

[Messy]

Can you disrespect a person and still love them?

Keeping in mind...

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, [5] does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,...

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

Yes. How about Jesus and His mother, when He put her in her place when she said they had no wine. I think this is often the case with parents or inlaws. It's not that you lose all respect for them, but if someone's parent or inlaw is a narcissist, you have to love them, but also have to protect your kids. I didn't have much respect for my grandfather and neither did my dad. My dad protected us. For years there was no contact whatsoever. He was an antitheist and tried to pull you from your faith. So I just prayed for him for 20 years or so until he died and the night before he died God said: You have the keys. Use them. Tomorrow will be too late. Then at the funeral my dad, who wasn't even saved yet and mom said: Well I hope he made it to heaven. Hope? I didn't pray my lungs out for 20 years for nothing. I later got a dream that he was saved. My faith is based on Ian McCormack's testimony. He got saved just before he died because God told his mother to pray for him and that's why he came back to tell her.
So I didn't respect him the way he was unsaved, but I did love him. Or maybe I did respect him. I remember my uncle tried to gossip about him when we all visited him and I got mad at him about that.

 

[tango]

Can you disrespect a person and still love them?

Keeping in mind...

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, [5] does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,...

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

You can lack respect for someone without disrespecting them.

 

[Josiah]

I keep hearing from people that respect has to be earned. But I read in Mark that Jesus said "Love your neighbor as yourself."

Do you think that respect has to be earned, or do you love your neighbor as yourself? Do you think the two statements are in conflict?

Are they the same thing? Can one love someone they don't respect? "Agape" is unconditional love. I doubt God "respects" us but He does love us.


.

 

[prism]

You can lack respect for someone without disrespecting them.

Perhaps, but that's not what I asked. I'm wondering why you quoted me.

 

[tango]

Perhaps, but that's not what I asked. I'm wondering why you quoted me.

Because you quoted me and asked a direct question.

 

[Romanos]

I have read before where people will say they are required to love them, but not to like them. It seems like the same premise.

 

[prism]

Because you quoted me and asked a direct question.

I was wondering why you quoted me because your statement had little to do with my question. Sorry for the confusion.
Let me ask again...
"Can you disrespect a person and still love them?"

 

[tango]

I was wondering why you quoted me because your statement had little to do with my question. Sorry for the confusion.

It has as much to do with your question as your question had to do with my post that you quoted. But, you know, whatever.

 

[prism]

It has as much to do with your question as your question had to do with my post that you quoted. But, you know, whatever.

I added this, I was too slow on the edit...

"Can you disrespect a person and still love them?"

 

[tango]

I added this, I was too slow on the edit...

"Can you disrespect a person and still love them?"

And I'd repeat my answer, you can lack respect for someone without actively disrespecting them.

To go a step further I think you can think someone is a steaming pile of garbage but still love them. As Romanos put it, you can love someone without liking them. You can actively dislike someone and still love them.

Given the relationship between the Israelites and the Samaritans I don't imagine the Good Samaritan would have had a high opinion of a Jew, but in the parable he still stepped up to help his fellow man in need. A parable rather than a real life story but it makes the point.

 

[Messy]

And I'd repeat my answer, you can lack respect for someone without actively disrespecting them.

To go a step further I think you can think someone is a steaming pile of garbage but still love them. As Romanos put it, you can love someone without liking them. You can actively dislike someone and still love them.

Given the relationship between the Israelites and the Samaritans I don't imagine the Good Samaritan would have had a high opinion of a Jew, but in the parable he still stepped up to help his fellow man in need. A parable rather than a real life story but it makes the point.

But the Samaritan did love him, so he also had respect for him. The Levite and the priest and the robbers hated him and had zero respect for him.

 

[tango]

But the Samaritan did love him, so he also had respect for him. The Levite and the priest and the robbers hated him and had zero respect for him.

Did the Samaritan have respect for him, or simply recognise him as a fellow human in need of help?

The Levite and the priest aren't as clear cut as might first appear. Touching a dead body had consequences under the Law, so it's conceivable they were worried about becoming ceremonially unclean and those concerns outranked the concern for a man in need. Whatever we might think of that sense of priority it's not all that different from a decision we might face today. Do we stop to help someone, even if that means being late to work and possibly losing our job with all the consequences that entails?

You can think someone is a pile of trash but still accept they are a human underneath it all.

 

[Messy]

Did the Samaritan have respect for him, or simply recognise him as a fellow human in need of help?

The Levite and the priest aren't as clear cut as might first appear. Touching a dead body had consequences under the Law, so it's conceivable they were worried about becoming ceremonially unclean and those concerns outranked the concern for a man in need. Whatever we might think of that sense of priority it's not all that different from a decision we might face today. Do we stop to help someone, even if that means being late to work and possibly losing our job with all the consequences that entails?

You can think someone is a pile of trash but still accept they are a human underneath it all.

It depends on how you define respect. It can be real respect or you just have the minimum respect for someone as a person. As long as they're not the antichrist you can give em something to eat when they starve.

 

[GregJ7]

The term respect can refer to several different things. There is a type of politeness that is respectful. There is a manner of behavior that is respectful, and there is such a thing as respect in one's heart for another.

The first one is typically one's manner because of how one was raised, but it is also a conscious decision.

The second one is a choice that we make because of what we believe about another person. This is something a servant might put on display even when they don't respect the person (agree with the principles the employer lives by, for example).

The last one must be earned, because this kind of respect is based on appreciating or honoring something or some attribute of the person. To learn that we need to experience something having to do with the person and seeing them come through it properly (according to the kinds of things we respect). Ideally, that is to have experiences of the person being honest, steadfast, reliable, etc. There is a kind of respect similar to that we can acquire from seeing a video of, or hearing about, the person, but it is only at a superficial level and can end up swinging either way if personal experiences of the person are acquired.

 

[GregJ7]

Can you disrespect a person and still love them?

Yes. I suspect this is usually the case for parents and their young (sometimes older) children. Rhetorical question: When's the last time one of your parents asked you for advice?