Are you more "couple" or "individual" in your marriage?

[Lamb]

Do you and your spouse feel as if you're more of a couple or just two individuals living together? Or does it just depend on the day/week/circumstances?

 

[Tigger]

My wife is essential my soul mate.

 

[Krissy Cakes]

Me with having the disorders that I have there are times where it feels like we just live together even tho I love him and couldn't see us not together. I know I am hard to live with but he loves me. So all in all when I'm having good days I feel like we are a couple but when I'm having bad ones I feel like we just live together and we end up getting on each others nerves.

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[Lamb]

My husband and I have been together since we were teenagers. We dated for 6 years and have been married for 25. I often feel as if I'm just an individual and even like you said, Army Wife, I love him still but I don't see us as this strong couple. We feel like family, yes, that's true but maybe it's just because I am an introvert and I really enjoy being alone?

 

[Tigger]

My husband and I have been together since we were teenagers. We dated for 6 years and have been married for 25. I often feel as if I'm just an individual and even like you said, Army Wife, I love him still but I don't see us as this strong couple. We feel like family, yes, that's true but maybe it's just because I am an introvert and I really enjoy being alone?

Lol! My wife and I are both introverts, so we're always alone together

 

[tango]

My husband and I have been together since we were teenagers. We dated for 6 years and have been married for 25. I often feel as if I'm just an individual and even like you said, Army Wife, I love him still but I don't see us as this strong couple. We feel like family, yes, that's true but maybe it's just because I am an introvert and I really enjoy being alone?

Personally I think it's important that husbands and wives do have their own time that isn't totally dependent on each other. If you only ever do stuff together you risk missing out on a whole host of other friendships. I love my wife more than anything but still enjoy a boys night out, and she enjoys a girls night out. If you live in each others pockets it can easily become unhealthy, but if you end up as "married singles" where you live your own lives and the only thing you have in common is that you sleep in the same bed and have the same bank account then sooner or later the love will most likely grow cold. The right balance is different for everyone, although the main thing is probably that both are happy with it.

It seems to me that problems arise when one person has very different expectations to the other, and they don't communicate what they want. That applies to just about every aspect of marriage, not just how much time you spend together.