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    Christian Advice Requested - Thread: Don't want to marry

    1. #1
      Jason's Avatar
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      Don't want to marry

      Whenever marriage topic comes up i get very angry, i am not interested in getting married. I feel this is due to my inferiority complex, fear and shyness. I don't have a strong confidence in myself so don't want to move to a family life.

      Is it bad to stay Single and live a Christian life? I know there is a verse saying "It is not good for the man to be alone"

    2. #2
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      Quote Originally Posted by Jason View Post
      Whenever marriage topic comes up i get very angry, i am not interested in getting married. I feel this is due to my inferiority complex, fear and shyness. I don't have a strong confidence in myself so don't want to move to a family life.

      Is it bad to stay Single and live a Christian life? I know there is a verse saying "It is not good for the man to be alone"
      I don't think it's bad to stay single. Remember also that you might change your mind one day and I think society has really let up on forcing people to get married and if you're a bachelor for a long time it doesn't bring about a negative connotation.
      "Christianity does not require more work but more trust." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "Bearing fruit does not make you a branch. A branch is a branch because it grows from the vine." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "A Christian's life is not defined by what the Christian does. It is defined by Christ and what He has done for us." Pr. Rolf David Preus

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    4. #3
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      Parents worry is that i may suffer very badly when i am alone. I understand what it is to be Single and the difficulties.

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      It’s better to work on our selves before marriage than being in a bad marriage were both parties have unresolved issues.
      Last edited by Tigger; 06-15-2019 at 09:36 PM.

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      Quote Originally Posted by Jason View Post
      Whenever marriage topic comes up i get very angry, i am not interested in getting married. I feel this is due to my inferiority complex, fear and shyness. I don't have a strong confidence in myself so don't want to move to a family life.

      Is it bad to stay Single and live a Christian life? I know there is a verse saying "It is not good for the man to be alone"
      There's nothing wrong with being single. It's better to be single than to marry just for the sake of getting married. Why would you commit your future to someone, unless you truly want to spend the rest of your life with that person?

      God made Eve so that Adam would have a companion, not so every future man would be obligated to select a companion.
      "Do what thou will shall be the whole of the law" - Aleister Crowley

      "If you love me, obey my commandments" - Jesus Christ

      The Bible comes as a complete package. If we want to pluck verses out of context so make them mean what we want them to mean, if we want to ignore the passages that are inconvenient to our outlook, we should be intellectually honest enough to throw our Bibles in the trash and admit we are following Crowley and not Christ.

    8. #6
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      Quote Originally Posted by Jason View Post
      Parents worry is that i may suffer very badly when i am alone. I understand what it is to be Single and the difficulties.
      Is it okay if I ask what kind of suffering they think you'll endure? You don't have to answer if it's really private!
      "Christianity does not require more work but more trust." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "Bearing fruit does not make you a branch. A branch is a branch because it grows from the vine." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "A Christian's life is not defined by what the Christian does. It is defined by Christ and what He has done for us." Pr. Rolf David Preus

    9. #7
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      Quote Originally Posted by Jason View Post
      Whenever marriage topic comes up i get very angry, i am not interested in getting married. I feel this is due to my inferiority complex, fear and shyness. I don't have a strong confidence in myself so don't want to move to a family life.

      Is it bad to stay Single and live a Christian life? I know there is a verse saying "It is not good for the man to be alone"
      Read 1 Corinthians 7.

      Just a few excerpts...

      1 Corinthians 7:8-9,17,27-28,32,35
      To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
      Only let each person lead the lifethat the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches.
      Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. I want you to be free from anxieties.
      The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.
      I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.

    10. #8
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      Quote Originally Posted by Tigger View Post
      It’s better to work on our selfs before marriage than being in a bad marriage were both parties have unresolved issues.

      Amen. Very good point.



      AND, there's nothing WRONG with choosing to be single (not in a relationship). I PERSONALLY don't accept the whole "friends with benefits" and "live together" option but certainly many do. But I do accept those who choose to be one (as for example my former priest), for many reasons. St. Paul seemed to have found value and worth in such. A valid option. And of course, we all chose to be single for a period of time..... we may not be ready for such a HUGE responsibility and change...


      PERSONALLY, the greatest earthly blessing in my life has been my wife (well, my son too but I would have him without her). As I compare my pre-marriage life (which was a very blessed and happy one) with my life since marriage, there is no comparison, I am SO very, very, very much more blessed, more "whole." And it grows in blessedness every day. I highly recommend marriage, lol (and you can tell my wife I said so).
      We are justified by works - just not our own.

    11. #9
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      Thank you all for the advice. I better spend more time in prayer and understand God's will too.

    12. #10
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      If you don't want to get married, then you don't have to do so. Yes, God created woman because he didn't want to see man be alone. However, it does not say that a man is forced to take a woman and make her his wife. There are verses in the Bible that talk about marriage but none of them say that a man is forced to take a wife.

      There may come a day when you'll meet exactly the right person and you may change your mind. If you do, then that's okay. But don't let anyone force you to go out and get married. Don't let anyone force you to marry if you don't want to, especially if it's not something that's going to make you happy. Getting married to someone who you are truly happy with is something that is suppose to be happy....not something that is suppose to make you miserable.

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