Early on, in another thread on the topic of Baptism, one of our Anabaptist (on this) friends stressed that there is a difference in whether we see various things as CO-requisites or PRE-requisites. I noted then that that was very insightful (he's since entirely abandoned all that).
Both "sides" note a number of things God wants to happen, it's just the (sole) view from 63 AD at the latest until 1523 (and by far the majority view today) is that they are simply all requisites (he'd say CO-requisites): Things God wants, commands, can and does use.... "they shall not return to me void but shall accomplish all for which I purpose". Not until a German individual in 1523 did anyone see in the Bible or just assume that there is a very exact, "Step 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...." a divinely mandates chronological sequence to all this (that the Bible just forgot to note) that if we don't DO all this in that precise chronological sequence, God is rendered impotent. Why did that Anabaptist invent that (and also the "Age of Accountability)? Because they were required by his very radical synergism. The orthodox/historic view sees all these as a "set" - all tools in the hands of the Carpenter - impotent in themselves but used for miracles in the hands of the Miracle Worker, the Author and Lord and Giver of Life.
I think the reason why we can historically trace infant baptism to around 63 AD.... the reason why we see whole families being baptized in the Bible... the reason why no one thought of anti-paedobaptism and credobaptism until one dude in 1523.... is because we saw all these as a "set" and tools in the hands of a LOVING, giving, blessing, God who is love and who is the Author and GIVER of Life. The orthodox/historical view sees all this together.... and we view it in the context of community and family. And the VAST majority of Christians still do. But of course, radical individualism and synergism have infected Christianity and the impact of that can be seen.
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