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    Christian Advice Requested - Thread: What ways do you deal with grief?

    1. #1
      Lämmchen's Avatar
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      What ways do you deal with grief?

      What ways do you find work best for you in dealing with grief?
      "Christianity does not require more work but more trust." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "Bearing fruit does not make you a branch. A branch is a branch because it grows from the vine." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "A Christian's life is not defined by what the Christian does. It is defined by Christ and what He has done for us." Pr. Rolf David Preus

    2. #2
      faramir.pete's Avatar
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      Only one thing heals grief, and that is time. Time for God to calm the storm and teach you peace again.


      Pete from Peterborough UK

    3. #3
      Lämmchen's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by faramir.pete View Post
      Only one thing heals grief, and that is time. Time for God to calm the storm and teach you peace again.


      Pete from Peterborough UK
      Is there anything you do in the meantime to help soothe yourself?
      "Christianity does not require more work but more trust." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "Bearing fruit does not make you a branch. A branch is a branch because it grows from the vine." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "A Christian's life is not defined by what the Christian does. It is defined by Christ and what He has done for us." Pr. Rolf David Preus

    4. #4
      Josiah's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by faramir.pete View Post
      Only one thing heals grief, and that is time. Time for God to calm the storm and teach you peace again.

      ... yeah, I think TIME is important (and that means patience - with self and others).


      For ME, two things HELP:

      1) TALKING. I like to talk things out.... this usually requires people who listen (with love, care, support, patience). It can be weird because when I do, I seem to go round and round a lot (which I don't like to do and find kind of embarrassing) but I think it's just the way this works.

      2) ACTION. I like to work things out (literally). For me, doing stuff always seems to help with any problematic emotion/feeling. I think this is partly a "guy thing." DOING something - hard, with sweat - it seems to work it out. Worse thing for me is to do nothing. Worse times for me are when I'm trying to get to sleep.


      "Comfort one another...." "weep with those who weep..."


      - Josiah



      .
      We are justified by works - just not our own.

    5. #5
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      how i deal w grief: i post my feelings somewhere and erase it lol. and replace em as soon as possible.
      Last edited by Imalive; 10-27-2017 at 03:02 PM.

    6. #6
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      It depends on who it is and why. When my grandparents died I did the eulogy for both of them. They died several years apart. That was a healing experience. You can do something in memory or honor of the person and that might help. Otherwise, just talking about them and crying are what I have done.

    7. #7
      faramir.pete's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by Lämmchen View Post
      Is there anything you do in the meantime to help soothe yourself?
      Well this is a tough one for me. The first time I experienced real personal grief was when my son died at just two days old. You can no doybt imagine that what should have been a time of great joy and turmoil if a new baby instantly collapsed, our life turned very dark indeed, and I turned to drink to soothe the pain. Thankfully God hed other plans, but they took about 12 months to penetrate through the fog I was living in. The next time was when my father died. It was surreal really because I was not close to himin life, but when he died suddenly all the things I wanted to say and have him tell me were taken away. Thankfully I was a believer by then and prayer helped, I simply took my anger and frustration to God and down through the years God has answered my questions. Then shortly after Dad my Mum died, but she had alzheimers and had really left us 2 years before so we had already reconciled her parting.

      So in truth, to answer your question it depends on where you are in your journey.


      Pete from Peterborough UK

    8. Likes Josiah liked this post
    9. #8
      MennoSota is offline Expert Member
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      I turned to scripture. Reading about the saints who went on before me and walked through the valley gave me hope.
      I went for long hikes and bike rides to let God sooth my pain in his creation.
      I listened to music that reminded me that God is Sovereign.
      I wept and wept. Odd things could bring tears that soothed me.
      I rejoiced whenever someone would talk about the dear ones who had died. It meant that someone cared. (A word of advice. When someone loses a loved one, please talk about that person. It is good to remember. Don't stay silent out of fear of dragging up memories. Speak and bath that person in the memories that you have. It's healing.)
      I waited in silence. I had no more words to speak so the Spirit prayed on my behalf with groanings.
      I had my days of faith and my days of failure and hopelessness. I longed for the quiet stream where I could rest.
      I still grieve as time passes. Time does heal, but the scar remains. The scars, however, remind me that I follow the Savior and he tells me to pick up my cross and follow him. He tells me that in this life there are many troubles, but take heart...he has overcome the world.
      One of my favorite poems:
      Hast Thou No Scar

      by Amy Carmichael

      Hast thou no scar?
      No hidden scar on foot, or side, or hand?
      I hear thee sung as mighty in the land,
      I hear them hail thy bright ascendant star,
      Hast thou no scar?

      Hast thou no wound?
      Yet, I was wounded by the archers, spent.
      Leaned me against the tree to die, and rent
      By ravening beasts that compassed me, I swooned:
      Hast thou no wound?

      No wound? No scar?
      Yet as the Master shall the servant be,
      And pierced are the feet that follow Me;
      But thine are whole. Can he have followed far
      Who has no wound nor scar?

    10. #9
      Lämmchen's Avatar
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      I sing whenever I'm sad...even when dealing with grief.
      "Christianity does not require more work but more trust." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "Bearing fruit does not make you a branch. A branch is a branch because it grows from the vine." Pr. Jonathan Fisk
      "A Christian's life is not defined by what the Christian does. It is defined by Christ and what He has done for us." Pr. Rolf David Preus

    11. #10
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      I just refuse to deal w it. I cut soul ties and dont care. Nobody is crying in heaven because they miss me, so I don't either. And replace em within a day with a cat or something and the cat with another cat.

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